Bob Barr Says Young Voters Will Vote Libertarian

"Bob Barr has a long Libertarian voting record," explained a satirical Stephen Colbert. "In Congress he supported such privacy-friendly, small government initiatives as the Defense of Marriage Act, which made the government small enough to fit into a bedroom." "I, myself, am a Libertarian," he said. "I don't want big government to infringe on my right to tell other people how to live. And we Libertarians are finally having our moment in the sun! This is the year that many believe Libertarians will 'hold some serious sway in American politics.' We'll use that power to fulfill our dream of eliminating maximum occupancy rules in elevators and suggested age ranges on board games." "We're a big swing vote this time," explained Rep. Barr, running for President on the Libertarian ticket, "because Americans are finally realizing, at long last, that the current two-party system--the Democrats and the Republicans--have failed, and failed miserably, and simply will give them more of the same."Younger voters, especially, see a bleak future under a corrupt government that grows no matter who is in charge, said Barr. Libertarians, he continued, have a good candidate, "a fellow named Bob Barr," with few similarities to the infamous Ralph Nader. Combined with a solid platform, Barr predicts unprecedented support for the Libertarian ticket in the 2008 election. "You're a big advocate of personal privacy," said Colbert, who then asked: "Is that why you voted for the PATRIOT Act?" "I voted for the PATRIOT Act not because of that," Barr said, "but certainly--certainly, I have come to realize, as many members of Congress did, who voted for it based on a number of promises that were given to us by the Bush administration--at the highest level, shall we say...We realized very quickly those promises meant nothing." "What I've been trying to do over the last five years is to try and undo the PATRIOT Act," he continued, "and I would do that as President."